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A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of
your hands, cutting them profusely, and coming loose and flying across the
room, denting the freshly-painted project which you had carefully set in the corner where nothing could get to it.
Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench
with the speed of light.
A portable cutting tool used to make studs too short.
Used to round off bolt heads.
An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor touch-up jobs into
major refinishing jobs.
One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle ... It transforms
human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt
to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.
Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt heads.
Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable objects in your shop on fire.
A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood projectiles for
testing wall integrity.
HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK:
Used for lowering an automobile to the ground after you have installed your
new brake shoes, trapping the jack handle firmly under the bumper.
A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to cut good
aluminum sheet into smaller pieces that more easily fit into the trash can
after you cut on the inside of the line instead of the outside edge.
TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST:
A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength of everything you forgot
Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under lids or for opening old-style
paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing oil on your shirt; but can also be used,
as the name implies, to strip out Phillips screw heads.
A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used to convert common slotted
screws into non-removable screws and butchering your palms.
A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracket you needed
to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.
Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used as a
kind of divining rod to locate the most expensive parts adjacent to the object
we are trying to hit usually smashing the thumb that is holding the object that
you are trying to pound into whatever it is that you are working on
Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard cartons delivered
to your front door; works particularly well on contents such as seats, vinyl
records, liquids in plastic bottles, collector magazines, refund checks, and
rubber or plastic parts. Especially useful for slicing work clothes, but only
while in use.
Any handy tool that you grab and throw across the garage while yelling,
"SOB!" at the top of your lungs. It is also, most often, the next
tool that you will need.
"Its life or death now. Make your choice. Who's side are you on?"
:Dyou sure know your tools:D
1990 YJ........arjeepin on rockwells
That's pretty hilarious right thar!!
97 Jeep TJ, 3.25" lift, 31's, lock-right, other goodies. Trail Rig
95 Chevy Tahoe 2 door, 6.5L turbodiesel, 285/75R16 Kenda Klever M/T's on Toyota steelies, some other goodies. Daily Driver; Tow Rig; Expedition Rig